Growth: Embracing the Imperfections of Life

A Frictionless World (A world without entropy)

If you are like most people, I bet you want peace, a tranquil world, where everything works the way you want. Where you find money on your way home just beside the bush. A world where your partner can read your mind and buy you suya from Suya University without you asking. Where he orders you luxurious wigs without you dropping hints. And maybe throws in occasional massages. A world where growth is missing.

You get promoted every year at your firm with the least amount of work. A world where you are loved, happy, and everything just ticks. You glow like Jessica Alba, rich like Elon, and live as old as Methuselah. Maybe your version of this world is different, but you get what I mean.

So I will call this a frictionless world or better still a world with little to no entropy. I want to tell you that the probability of getting that life is like ~2% but more importantly, it’s not the kind of life you want. I know that sounds absurd but I won’t explain it because again the probability of you getting that fantasy is low, so I will save my caffeine high for something better.

The fantasy

I mean just writing this, and you reading this, you already feel like this is a fantasy but yet that’s actually what most of us want and expect out of life. Myself included, I mean who wouldn’t? Easy life, happy life, right?

The problem is not in wanting this, the problem is being entitled to this. Feeling the world owes you this and something is working against you if all these are not as you expect them to be. I mean don’t get me wrong, someone or something can be working against you, that’s a possibility but that’s another conversation, not one I am an expert on, so I will stay off it.

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The Ideal World

In the ideal world, you work. You grow or die. Everything you have and enjoying now, was worked for and built by you or those before you. Your body was given to you feeble, weak, and vulnerable, your parents have to nurture it to strength till you take over, the device you are reading this from was made, it didn’t just drop, some people made that.

We plant crops, we build houses, we innovate, we develop, the main existence of man is built on what he can do for himself first, his family, and then his community. The picture here is, that the world we live in is based on giving back and putting effort into the world. Don’t get carried away by the term putting effort into the world, no one is saying you have to cure cancer or anything like that.

What I am saying is our effort and actions every day make the world go round, and that effort is us going against entropy. Everything thats left to rot will rot, whether you want it to or not. It’s just the way the world works. To keep the ticks of the world and that in itself is work, an uphill against entropy.

A Case Study of Entropy

Not sure who this is attributed to, but there is a saying that The source of all human unhappiness stems from our desires. More importantly, the desires we are not willing to work for and navigate through entropy for.

Usually where we are and what we are is far from off from what we want to be and where we want to be. Some people like a friend of mine, who won’t mention his name, always want to be super rich like Bill Gates. For some folks like that, the distance between now and the future is very far and disorderly.

It has a high degree of entropy. And when we put in some effort and we don’t get what we want, most of us shout and blame the world for being too harsh and find a simpler goal to settle for, which sometimes is not a bad thing.

Let’s say I want to be the next Elon Musk in the fantasy world an idea would jump on me and boom it will blow up and make me rich, maybe I oversimplify it but I wouldn’t mind if it’s like that. But that rarely happens and I use rarely because I am not a fan of the word “never”. But permit me to say it never happens like that.

What usually happens is that there is a huge number of years of entropy between when you imagine yourself as the next Elon and when you become the next Elon. I mean unless if you decide to break some laws which is not what we are talking about here.

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Why You Hate Entropy

Entropy is disorderliness. It is stress.  It is the price. Entropy is the painful process. Entropy is the journey not the destination. Well, I guess that answers why you would hate it. We are wired to take the easiest path to a destination. It saves time and energy.

So why would I choose stress? You would prefer if your boss just liked you and promoted you than for you to work hard and earn the promotion so you might cozy up a little bit which is easier. However, entropy is growth and you are better off embracing it.

You would prefer your partner to just read your mind and follow suit than open your mouth and ask for what you want, because asking is work and vulnerable.

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Why You Should Like Entropy

Duh, because you don’t have a choice. That’s what I have been trying to tell you. It’s just the way the world works. You pay a price for everything you get. It comes in different forms but you surely pay.

The world is built on work. Garden needs tending, relationships need attention, projects need midnight candles, children need care, bodies need nourishment, books need reading, assignments need to be done, houses need cleaning, all these are entropy that your world needs to embrace.

Also, I think the world doesn’t care about who you are. I know that’s harsh. Your world does care about you, so don’t be sad but the world doesn’t. There is a difference. Even if you are the president of a nation, there are up to 10 successors planned to take over when you bow out.

The world is like a giant pie, everyone who needs something out of it has to reach out to take out of that pie, and that reaching out requires you to make an effort against entropy. The higher the part of the pie you want, the more entropy you go through. This ultimately lead to your growth.

In addition, some people believe victory doesn’t taste as good without friction, I am one of those people. Ever Wonder why every successful person always talks about when they haven’t made it, and why some even go a long way to fake it.

well I guess because it’s sweeter to sound like I worked for something than it is to say it fell on my lap. So in going through life, you want to account for entropy as part of it, because it is.

Embracing Entropy

Well, I hope I haven’t done a terrible job of painting a picture of entropy, what it is, and why you can’t avoid it. If that’s a yes, then I guess you would want to know how you can embrace it. Embracing entroyp is embracing growth but at the same time, it is embracing pain.

This is the sweet part, this is where I act as if I know everything I am going to list or implement them in my life. But I haven’t gotten to that level, I doubt anyone has because you have to be perfect to be and no one is. Anyway, let’s pretend I am and go ahead.

Life is Entropic in Nature:

Life is not constant, it hasn’t been and will never be. Embrace change, uncertainty, and the unknown as natural and inevitable aspects of life’s journey. Cultivate flexibility, adaptability, and openness to new experiences, perspectives, and possibilities to navigate transitions, explore opportunities, and grow through life’s ups and downs.

Life is Not Fair; I Doubt It’s Meant to Be:

Accept that life is inherently imperfect and unpredictable. Embracing imperfection allows you to let go of unrealistic expectations, comparisons, and judgments, and instead focus on celebrating progress, resilience, and personal growth. Whining about how some people have it easy is folly, continue that path the only thing you will get is a bitter, entitled ass when you look in the mirror.

Focus on What You Can Control:

Focus your energy and attention on aspects of life that you can control, influence, or change, rather than dwelling on circumstances or outcomes beyond your control. Practice acceptance, adaptability, and proactive problem-solving to navigate challenges and uncertainties with resilience and grace.

Find What You Are Willing to Suffer For:

Life is largely cycles of losses and wins. Identify what you are okay to go through this roller coaster for. Ask yourself, which career will I be okay learning for hours for? Is this weak-ass man worth the effort I am putting into this relationship? Skip that last question if you are a man, it might sound personal.

Ask existential questions and see if your suffering is even worth it. Identify and cultivate your values, passions, interests, and purpose to find meaning, fulfillment, and direction in life. When you find that, pay its price.

Love Yourself:

Like I said, life is not fair and You are sometimes going to be  treated unfairly; In such moments, love yourself. Deceive yourself if need be and tell yourself no life is better than yours.

Remind yourselves of your wins and when the world was kind to you, realize this too shall pass and a new dawn shall come. Wow, that almost sounds inspirational so let me say this, none of that has to be true, you just need to trick your mind into believing it and you will be amazed at how better you live.

Treat yourself with kindness, understanding, and compassion, especially during challenging times. Practice self-care, self-acceptance, and self-love to nurture your well-being, build resilience, and foster a positive and supportive relationship with yourself. Also, try ice cream, it helps.

You need a little more than self-love

I am serious; find love, it’s not a cliche. Whether that is romantic or in the form of deep friendship, though the earlier is better. Some people also say pets work, maybe you try that, I haven’t so I wouldn’t know.

Either way,  surround yourself with supportive and positive people who uplift, encourage, and inspire you. Foster meaningful connections, open communication, and mutual respect with friends, family, and mentors who can provide guidance, encouragement, and perspective during the ups and downs of life.

Change is Your Friend:

Adopt a growth mindset. View challenges and setbacks as opportunities for learning, growth, and development rather than insurmountable obstacles.

As coined by psychologist Carol Dweck, it emphasizes the belief that abilities and intelligence can be developed through dedication and hard work. Well, it’s not like you have a choice anyway, if you don’t find change it will find you, the best you can do is embrace it. Let the process of growth happens.

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Stop Fighting Yourself:

If you are not as brilliant as you would like attacking your brain won’t help. If your body is not what you imagine, you have to take care of it, not hate it.

I mean that’s the only one you have. Well sugery is an option nowadays. But the point is be at peace with your body, your mind, and your soul, stop fighting yourself so much. if not, even the perfect BBL won’t help you.

Push yourself to greatness but do it with care, man. Easy does it. This will help you cultivate resilience, reduce stress, and foster a deeper connection with yourself and the world around you.

Read a perspective i found interesting here